So this diet I'm on? Yeah, going to be sticking to it. I went shopping this weekend for something to wear to a wedding I will be attending on Friday. I came very, very, VERY close to just backing out of going at all. Finding something to wear was incredibly painful. Friday night Melissa and I went to Old Navy and Ross. I ended up buying a skirt and a tank top and shoes at Old Navy, with the hopes of maybe finding a shirt somewhere else. Ross was just a nightmare. Every dress I tried on was terribly terrible. Today Iris and I went to a different Ross. Same thing. I probably tried on 10 dresses. The only one that fit me well looked like something my mother or grandmother would wear. I couldn't show my face in public looking 40 years older than I am! I left empty handed. Target was my last chance to find something and I didn't have high hopes, since Target isn't really known to have things that are considered "cocktail" attire. But, there it was, all alone on a rack, one dress in the right size. This is the dress. It's perfect and hides all my flaws and covers enough of my upper body to allow me to wear an industrial sized bra. I realized that I already had shoes that would go with it, so I can return everything else to Old Navy. All I had to buy was stockings, which I got in black. Shoes, stocking and dress all in black, I wonder if I'm going to look like I'm going to a funeral? Oh, well.
All the shopping and disappointment has definitely cemented my commitment to the weight-loss efforts. Now that I am done having babies I feel like I can work harder at getting myself back in shape, and have the body I once did. It's not so far off, I suppose, I'm only two sizes bigger now than where I want to be.
My friend Julia was telling me she dropped a good sum of money on a personal trainer. I was feeling very jealous. I used to think that it was hard to leave the house on my own when I only had one child, now it's practically impossible. Iris is finally at the age where I can take her to drop in pre-school, or easily find a babysitter and now I have another baby. I know that in a couple of years it will be easier, but right now, this is how it is. But man, would I enjoy taking the time to go to a personal trainer! I've never been a big work-out/gym person, but I think I could get in to it if I had the right guidance. Maybe I can strap Eloise to me in the Mei Tai, send Iris to the daycare and spend some time on the treadmill? Hmmmm. Actually, what I miss is yoga class. The only yoga class I want to attend interferes with Iris's pre-school on Thursdays, and it logistically won't work for me to try to get everyone to both. I should try to find a new class, I suppose, but I'm too lazy. Plus, this one I could have taken Eloise to and it is taught by the woman who taught my prenatal class.
At any rate, I hope to be to my goal size by Christmas. That should be do-able, right? I don't own a scale, so I won't be trying to lose a certain amount of weight, I just want to get to a point that I like my body and can fit in to the clothes I want to wear. Easy peasy.