Saturday, May 19, 2007

Baby pangs

Today we went to visit some friends, Gabe and Abby, who have just returned from living in London since January. They have three children who are 6, 4 and 1. Their youngest was about Eloise's age when they left and I didn't have much memory of her-- usually when we were with them I was focused on my two children and their baby often was sleeping when we were around. Seeing her today, though, after several months away, was so much fun. She is 14 months old and very good at walking. She was really enjoying climbing on her brother and sister's things and was absolutely the most charming little girl!

As I watched the two older kids and Iris play together while the little one toddled around I spent some time chatting with Abby about raising children and how it changes with each subsequent child. I haven't really spent any time with a family with three small children, but watching those kids today made me think about how wonderful it would be to have three. For the first time since Eloise was born I briefly imagined having a third and didn't just freeze in fear. Instead I thought about amazing it would be and sad I felt that I just couldn't bring myself to birth any more babies. If babies could spontaneously appear, I would have a third in a heart beat. Abby said her first was hard because she was an anxious new mother. Her second was hard because they were so close together and her oldest had developed some medical issues that were a struggle. But her third? She could enjoy her third because she is more relaxed and can spend time alone with her when her older two are in school. When I saw how beautiful and happy and healthy their littlest daughter was, I just couldn't help but think about how lucky they are to have her in addition to their hilarious, smart and adorable older children.


  1. Oh, I'll admit that our 3rd does seem better this time around for me, but also I finally feel like I've done everything "right" (so to speak!) and just how I wanted it from planning to have him, the pregnancy, birth, etc! So different from our 1st two. But it seems like you've done a fabulous job with both your girls! For the first time ever I *don't* get the baby pangs when around babies and I think it's my soul saying I'm content. I don't know if it will be this way forever, but it's a good feeling!


  2. I also have a 6,4, and 1 yr. old. It's nice that the baby is getting big, but kinda sad too. He's been easier on me all the way around than the last two. The birth was better, the nursing was waaaay easier, and I love having three. Now, of course, I get tired and frustrated when they gang up on me, but I love em'!!! I see other babies and wish I could have another, and I could, but I'm not sure if I want to. I had a really hard pregnancy with #3, and I do not want to do that again!! And, it was sooo stressful to know what I was going to do with the other two while I was in the hopsital. I can't imagine having 3 to find child care for. But, the IDEA of 4 sounds goos, I'm just not sure if I could handle it.

  3. A third might be nice if you can guarantee me a boy M-S. Although, I think another pregnancy would kill both us, so you better start researching adoption.

  4. I just cut off all my hair and I have 16 inches to donate... I was just wondering if you still have the address of where you sent your donation, because I'm not finding anything on the web...

  5. I, too, have been thinking about a 3rd lately! I NEVER in a million years thought I'd ever even entertain the idea of 3 kids...but now it seems like it might be nice! My husband tells me "no chance in h***!" We'll see...I still have 2 years to change his mind :)


Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment!