I have realized lately that it bothers me to no end when people say that a baby is a "good baby". For instance, if a baby doesn't cry then they are a good baby. Like somehow crying makes a baby, what, bad? Or a child is a "good kid" if they are easy for an adult to deal with, ie obedient and quiet and perfectly respectful.
The reason that this kind of language bothers me is mostly because I have a child who has a really strong personality. By most definitions of "good", she isn't. She hits her sister, she screams, she throws things, she often contradicts what I say. I don't think this makes her bad, or at least, not good. I think this makes her two (quickly going on three). I think this makes her passionate and full of energy and spirited.
It makes my skin crawl when people say to me "Eloise is such a good baby! She hardly cries!" because I know that she does cry. A lot. More than I would like her to, usually. I wonder if those people saw her crying would they say "oh, how unfortunate, she's not a very good baby."
I wish so much that people didn't equate good with easy. Good with happy. Good with, well, anything, when it comes to children. A good child acts how adults would like them to, apparently. Yes, my older daughter gets under my skin, some days to the point I can't handle it another second, but she is equally as loving, empathetic, creative, and well, you name it. Her pendulum swings FAR is both directions, I like to think. She is a damn good kid.