Monday, December 23, 2013

Blah Humbug

I am not sure exactly why, but I feel very . . . blah about this Christmas. It's not that I don't want to be excited and have energy to embrace the holidays, because I do want to, I just don't have it in me for some reason. Not exactly sure why? I was about to blame it on how awful I've felt since we brought the kittens home, but truth be told, I lost my Christmas mojo even before those adorable little furballs joined our family.

Each year I traditionally do an advent calendar for the girls, a pretty well thought out one, at that, but this year? Nothing. I told the girls I just didn't have the energy for it and they seemed okay about it. Last year we went to the Nutcracker, for the second year in a row, and I was so darn sure I would make a tradition out of it. But this year? Nope, didn't do it. I didn't put the tree up, Matt and Eloise did, though likely I would have done it if they hadn't. 

Let's see, what else can I whine about? Usually we do gingerbread houses on Christmas Eve, but this year I asked the girls (well, I only asked Iris) if it would be okay to do them the week after Christmas since we'll have much more time on our hands then. They (and by they, I mean she) was okay with that. When I told Eloise about it today she was bummed. The Santa gift will be a little uninspired this year, since the kittens were the "big gift" and they already got those. Santa came up with something fun, but it won't blow the girls' minds. Kittens under the tree would have blown their minds, but that just was going to be way too difficult to pull off. 

Today as the girls and I wandered through Trader Joe's I oggled all of the Christmas cookies, wanting to pile my cart full of them all. And why? Well, if you had guessed it was because we made no cookies ourselves, you would be right. Technically Iris made like a dozen cut-out cookies with her friend last week but I was too sick to help much that night and they gave up about 1/8 of the way through rolling and cutting. I only bought candy joe-joes today, however, because the idea of having TJ's cookies for Christmas depressed me even more than having no cookies at all. Usually my parents and grandparents are good for shipping a couple of boxes of homemade cookies in the mail, but not this year. We're going to have bake our own if we want any, which will leave us with far too many cookies, and which always, always leads to me eating about 75% of them myself because I have zero self-control. 

Today was also the day that my annual "holy shit, I should have bought the girls WAY MORE CRAP!" guilt hit me. It's a good thing I was home all day with both girls or else I would have been playing Supermarket Sweep through the aisles of Target. Does this ever happen to you? You thoughtfully purchase things for your kids, picking stuff that is fun and affordable off of their lists, but then in end you look at what you bought and decide that your effort was piss-poor, and that if you were a better parent you would have bought bigger gifts/more gifts/more expensive gifts and then layer the guilt on yourself a foot thick? Maybe it's just me? We've reminded the girls a lot of times that they already got their big gift (the kittens), so I hope they are just as excited on Christmas morning as they always are. 

Tonight I decided we would go see the neighborhood Christmas lights. Some folks around here do it up BIG. You are dead right if you assumed our house has no lights on it. Yep, another Christmas fail. Our girls are bummed about that, too. 

Here is Iris admiring a teeny tiny portion of a ginormous display:


How is your Christmas season? Hopefully more exciting than ours? 

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